idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Randomize
