I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
You sat on a wall pretending to be a gargoyle before shouting "batman!" and jumping at me
I'm the drunk Des Moines deserves, but not the one it needs
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
Randomize
