I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
Randomize
