Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
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