people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Randomize