Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
