Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Randomize
