I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
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