So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
