nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
