Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
Randomize
