Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
His nipple licking is glorious
Randomize
