how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
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