how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
Randomize
