Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
