So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
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