Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Randomize
