I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize