The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Randomize