Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
try to milk me bitch
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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