That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Randomize