I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
Randomize