you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
You're wonderful. How are you always such a good friend?
50% genetics, 50% driven by a desire for people to drunkenly eat donuts at my funeral and then have fantastic cry-sex afterward.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Randomize
