Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
