What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
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