I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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