First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
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