oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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