needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Randomize
