i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
