He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Randomize
