Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
This dress was meant to end up on your floor
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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