If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
farters have to be the big spoon...
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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