hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
mom just said that her bf is good in bed. fml.
i am watching a movie about a vagina with teeth and then you sent that to me while im eating sushi.
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
the day after is always just damage control
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
Randomize
