I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Randomize