i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
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