are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Randomize
