And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Randomize
