ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
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