If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
Randomize
