Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
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