Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
Floor bacon is actually really good
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
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