chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
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