I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
