I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
