she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
When my options for Friday night are being a 3rd wheel or bringing a gay man as my date i need to focus on other things in life like having a successful career.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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