Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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