Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
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