If you die in college, do you die in real life?
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
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