I love black thongs
You're completely useless in the revolution.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
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