2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
