Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize
